Writing Task 1: Consultation with family doctors
he table shows data about the average length of time (in minutes) that people of different ages spend in a consultation with family doctors in a number of countries.
Write a report summarizing the information. Select and describe the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
You should spend about 20 minutes on this Task.
The table shows data about the average length of time (in minutes) that people of different ages spend in a consultation with family doctors in a number of countries.
Write a report summarizing the information. Select and describe the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Write at least 150 words.
Table 1: Minutes spent with a doctor on average
|
Age (years) |
France |
Brazil |
Japan |
USA |
India |
Kenya |
UK |
Italy |
Chile |
|
0-10 |
16 |
12 |
14 |
13 |
12 |
15 |
9 |
17 |
32 |
|
10-20 |
18 |
21 |
12 |
17 |
14 |
14 |
12 |
18 |
32 |
|
20-40 |
25 |
23 |
16 |
19 |
20 |
12 |
13 |
23 |
34 |
|
40-60 |
29 |
26 |
15 |
21 |
21 |
12 |
15 |
24 |
36 |
|
60-70 |
34 |
23 |
13 |
27 |
19 |
11 |
15 |
27 |
38 |
|
70+ |
38 |
20 |
14 |
31 |
11 |
10 |
21 |
29 |
39 |
Model 9.0 Essay
The chart gives information about the typical time that patients spend with doctors in various countries, SPLIT BY age group.
We can see that the most common trend is for THE TIME TO INCREASE CONSISTENTLY WITH age. For example, the figure in France MORE THAN DOUBLES from 16 to 38 minutes between the youngest and oldest people. LIKEWISE, the USA figure rises from 13 to 31, the UK from 9 to 21, and Italy from 17 to 29. These are all substantial increases. Chile has A CONSISTENT BUT MUCH SLIGHTER CLIMB, from 32 to 39 minutes.
Brazil also shows a rise, although after age 60 there is a decline from 26 minutes to an eventual 20. India has a more marked rise and fall, PEAKING AT 21 minutes for people aged 40 to 60, declining to 11 minutes for 70 plus.
Two countries are EXCEPTIONS. Japan fluctuates across the age groups, between 12 and 16 minutes. Kenya declines steadily as age increases, from 15 minutes for the youngest to 10 minutes for the oldest people.
Overall, time spent with doctors generally increases with age, except in Japan and Kenya.
(181 words)
Examiner’s Comments
This is a high quality Band 9 essay, with logical grouping of data and clear explanation of trends and exceptions.
The candidate paraphrases well in the introduction, and then in the main body she very clearly introduces the main group trend (time increases consistently with age.) She then gives 4 selected figures to demonstrate this group (France, USA, UK, Italy.) She begins a new paragraph and puts Brazil and India in this group, which is logical, but she is careful to point out that they are slightly different (they rise and decline) using suitable figures from the data.
The next paragraph shows that she sees the exceptions (Japan and Kenya) and explains why they are different (fluctuation and decline respectively) using a ‘range set’ (“between 12 and 16” etc) without too much detail. The summary sentence is rather short, but it sums up the main trends/exceptions well and does not repeat details.
The language is varied but always clear; present simple tense is used correctly; the candidate uses phrases to qualify the verbs (eg “consistently, steadily, marked, generally”); similarities are clearly indicated (eg similar, likewise) and the candidate seeks to show the proportion of the rise in the main group (“For example, the figure in France more than doubles.”)
Trying to explain or suggest reasons for the situation is a frequent error in Task 1 data essays, but this candidate does not make that mistake.
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